Culture Shock #26: Germany is a Starbucks desert

I know that even the U.S. Americans reading this post will think "Oh god, this is so embarrassingly U.S. American of you, please represent us with a little more class and dignity." To which I say: No.

I. Miss. Starbucks.

There is one Starbucks at the central train station in Freiburg, which takes me about 30 minutes to reach from my house. I find this to be too long and too far. I think there's one other Starbucks in Freiburg, but I don't know where it is, and I think that's illustrative enough to make my point. In this blog post, I will mourn the Great German Starbucks Scarcity. You will read this post whether you take pity on me or not because I am funny and you like to laugh.

In college, there was a Starbucks two minutes from my house. There was also a Starbucks on State street, in case I was at the Union and needed a tall iced oat milk dirty chai between study sessions. There was also a Starbucks on Main street, in case I fancied a grande iced oat milk matcha latte on my way to the Saturday farmer's market. There was also a Starbucks on Washtenaw, in case I needed an Impossible Breakfast Sandwich ("Impossible" as in "It's impossible that this sausage patty is made of soy because it tastes so meaty juicy and delicious!") while waiting for my car to get repaired at Firestone. There was also a Starbucks on Plymouth in case my roommate needed to flirt with the barista and I needed a cake pop. (Dear reader, please know that I did not need to Google any of this. The Ann Arbor Starbucks locations are burned into the back of my brain, an integral part of my college experience. I did, however, need to Google how to spell "Scarcity". So. Two degrees baby.)

To be clear, I did not go to Starbucks every day back in the states, or even every week. I never took a Starbucks drink for granted; every Starbucks purchase was a special treat. And when a friend bought me something from Starbucks? God, what a sign of love and loyalty. I think I've received one Starbucks gift card in my life. I had a brief stint with the app but quickly deleted it after I saw it was doing more harm to my bank account than good to my Starbucks-enjoying soul. 

Nevertheless, I miss the mere existence of Starbucks. I miss walking by Starbucks after Starbucks and knowing exactly what it will look like inside, what the menu has to offer. On days when I have to interact with an abnormally large number of heterosexuals, I miss knowing that I can walk into a Starbucks and immediately find my people behind the counter. I miss wondering if someone is going to clock me and write something sweet on my cup. I miss knowing at least one person in my life who works at a Starbucks, whom I can visit and get a free drink from. I miss the dread of going with my sister because I know they're going to fight to order first and use my name because "Alina" is too difficult to understand, and then I'm going to have to make up a new-and-just-as-easy-to-understand name on the spot, only to forget it when it gets called out later. I admit it: Comfort sells, and moving to Germany made me realize that Starbucks has me sold.

P.S. I'm secretly-not-so-secretly hoping that this blog post will inspire my loved ones (aka you guys) to generously welcome me back to the U.S. with a slew of starbucks gift cards. :)